Bada Bing! Wit A Pipe!

Listening To: Bada Bing! Wit A Pipe! by Four Years Strong

Feeling: Hungry (Doesn't that just ruin the serious mood of a post)

"...Sing it back to me; this is your life story

You didn't even know it you're trying not to blow it

Because you're kicking back a death wish and here I am just riding out the storm

Believe me when I say that I want to give up

I want to give up but it's bad enough to keep me hooked

Just to watch you curse my name and toss and turn..."

I was thinking about some of the better ways that I've changed, even though it seems like it's a bit narcissistic to think about oneself too much, but I guess I am pretty self-absorbed and vain sometimes, andothers I have low self-esteem, usually when I'm around a cute boy.

But that's entirely beside the point. We're talking about my positive changes; my positive points.

I would have to say that I think I've improved in my writing; I think the movements are smoother, less rough, and the characters have more complexity and originality. They have songs that describe them, and since my art skills have also seemed to improve, I can get them straighter in my head when I draw them. They now have pasts and lives before the story that I'm writing them in. They don't have just a generic personality.

The art skills that seem to've crept up behind me and consumed me, making me draw all the time lately because of my writer's block, that are getting better have caused my parents to run out and buy me a huge sketchbook (The sheets of paper are maybe twice the size of my laptop screen? And wider?), art supplies, loose sketch paper. It takes a lot for my parents to be impressed; they don't impress or compliment easily, and they would never say I was good if I weren't. Still, this isn't pumping my ego. My head is staying roughly the same size it's always been. I don't think a day's gone by since my writer's block that I haven't at least doodled something, even if it's small.

Listening To: YEAH! Ska Dance by Oreskaband

"...Kimi ni namida ni mou hitotsu

Kireina mizu wo sosogou ka?

Kanashii toki niwa issho ni nakou

Sukoshizutsu shiawase ni narebaii..."

The fact that I'm also listening to music all the time also makes me happy, for some reason. I can almost always find a song to match my current situation, mood, what I'm writing, or what I'm drawing. Music seems to make things very easy or easier. I used to listen to music a lot before, but now I am literally pretty much doing one/multiple of these things at once at all times: on the computer, reading, writing, drawing, listening to music.

I'm also still attempting to learn Japanese and more about the Asian culture, but I hate how every other teenager is an "otaku" and whenever I attempt to say that I'm serious about the Japanese culture, people brush me off by saying, "Isn't everyone supposedly serious about the Japanese culture?" I don't like it when they do it, but they don't know me. I try not to care so much, as it's just them running their mouth off and not really caring. I'm friends with one of these people, though, so no hard feelings.